Train

October 26, 2009

(Disclaimer: no cats were harmed in any way in the research, preparation, or writing of this entry.)

Of course, you can read almost anything on the internet, even from seemingly sterling sources.

For instance, I read in the New York Times that "all the students at Luolang Elementary School, a yellow-and-orange concrete structure off a winding mountain road in southern China, know the key rules:

Do not run in the halls.
Take your seat before the bell rings.
Raise your hand to ask a question.

And oh, yes:

Salute every passing car on your way to and from school."

I also read that "careers in personal fitness training are growing dramatically in job demand and pay range each year. Since people are becoming more aware of health issues everyday and want to change the way they live, now is a good time to seek a career in personal fitness training" (http://www.degreesource.com/articles/82/1/Personal-Fitness-Trainer-Job-Description/1.html, note bene: all quotes below also come from this internet source.)

Why is this important and worth mentioning? Willie has gotten off the dole and has taken a new position as a personal trainer for some feral cats. He takes his job seriously.

"The main responsibility of a personal fitness trainer [apparently] is to instruct and coach both groups and individuals in various exercises and activities." This he does with great enthusiasm, whether the cats are bunched together in a group or fleeing in individual directions.

A personal trainer should strive "to help his clients assess their physical fitness level and encourage and help them set and reach their fitness goals." Willie is willing to go the extra mile, or the extra lap around the garage, to make sure his clients reach their maximum physical potential and their fitness goals.

The article goes on to list a few things personal fitness trainers do:

• "Motivating clients and team members"--I have never seen cats more motivated than the ones working out with Willie. He provides a one-on-one program tailored to fit the specific needs of his clients.
  
• "Assisting clients in breathing exercises"--He is especially adept at raising heart rate and breathing function of his clients.
  
• "Identifying specific training needs"--Young cats clearly need to work on quick climbing to avoid predators and reach their highest potential. He adds the personal touch of working with his clients in the privacy of their own neighborhood.
• "Applying first aid procedures"--None needed, so far.
  
• "Constructing instructional programs"--Willie acts as a particularly forceful motivator who helps push his clients to their limits.
  
• "Leading various recreational activities"--Willie focuses on hide-and-seek and chase rather than on other more complex and equipment-dependent recreational activities. This allows his clients to avoid expensive gym memberships and investment in equipment that will soon end up in the basement, spare bedroom, or on Craig's list.
  
• "Monitoring and communicating client progress"--Believe me, Willie watches his clients' progress during workouts as well as through the sliding glass door during down time. He communicates about it with anyone who will listen.
  
• "Demonstrating each physical activity"--Willie falls a little short here. He is willing to run step for step with his clients. He is even willing to low crawl, following them underneath trucks and cars as the go through the obstacle course. He has not demonstrated tree climbing for them, however. I am proud to say that he did not overturn Marvin's truck when he stood up underneath it yesterday. Maybe, he needs to look into personal liability insurance for those occasions of strenuous.

Like all good personal trainers, Willie knows how to avoid pushing his clients to the point where they injure themselves.