Learn

May 25, 2012


You learn so much when you have to take over someone else's responsibilities.  I have depended on Maximillian for years, actually decades, to change the air filters for the A/C system.  Today he supervised and I did the labor.  He does this every month.  I can only imagine what the filter would look like if I had been in charge, because if the filter can trap that much dust in a month, imagine how much would be there if you waited 29 years.


And apparently, I'm not capable of preparing the dogs' breakfast. . . at least according to them.  There are written instructions.  I follow them to the letter.  And yet?  It just doesn't taste the same.  Everyone picks at their food and leaves more than half before discouragement sets in and they wander off in hopes of a better menu elsewhere.  Well, that's not exactly true.  Uma has eaten it all, every day but the one day she had a stomach bug and left evidence of the malady on Walter's office floor.  But Uma doesn't really count because she is like Mikey from the Life cereal commercial:  she'll eat anything.


What else?  


The dishwasher doesn't breakdown or even protest if you run it more than once a day.


Pomegranate juice costs much more than you expect.


If you want the figs to ripen, you have to water every other day.


You never really understand how many glasses of water a 200 pound man raised in the desert drinks each day, until you have to bring him each glass.  I have started leaving them in strategic spots around the house like Hansel and Gretel leaving bread crumbs on the path.


It's really impossible to walk the dogs as much as they prefer.


The sounds of crutches moving slowly and methodically around a house would be an excellent way to create suspense and terror in a horror movie.


Screws, Bolts, and Staples may be in Maximillian's right foot, but it would also be an outstanding name for a rock band.


Sleeping alone is overrated.